Let’s talk about mental health. We often ignore the fact that mental health is as important as being physically fit. How can you be healthy with a mind that over thinks and feels unloved? It is a common misconception that only adults are going through depression and anxiety. Even children feel unloved and cornered.
When there are elder and younger siblings in the picture, it is possible that one of them feels that they are not getting the love that they deserve. Dearest parents, you need to work on making your child feel special.
Childhood should be innocent and free from stress, ego and displeasure. Your kid’s childhood should be joyous, and this is your responsibility to share equal love with both the kids. You can do a number of things to make a child feel loved. Here’s an important post that covers the topic – How to make your child feel loved and valued?
Did you know that as per a study 80% of the adults felt that they were not loved by their parents. Do you want your child to grow up and be a part of such surveys?
As a parent, you are in a dilemma. Whether it is a toddler, a 9-year-old child or a teenager, you need to abide by them and never leave their hand. As new parents, you might feel helpless but showcasing love does not require a lot of effort. There are some easy day-to-day practices that can make your child feel loved.
Let’s get started!
Understanding That Problems are a Part and Parcel of Life
Before skimming through the everyday practices, you need to understand that problems can arise in everyone’s life. You are not the only person who is going through issues. There can be financial issues, depression and indifference towards you from the partner, but that does not mean that the child is not worthy of love.
If you and your partner are going through a tough phase that leads to divorce or separation, it does not mean that the child must suffer. As mature people, you have to give time to the child and not let them get affected by your decision of parting ways.
In case one parent is busy and the other keeps complaining, then this is a loophole. No matter how busy the other parent is, one of them should make time for the young child.
You can take out time for the child by:
- Switch off your phone while spending time with your child.
- Take a leave once in a week. It is not too much to ask for!
- Take interest in what they love. It could be helping them paint a picture of grandma or baking with them.
Parents must understand that problems are a part and parcel of life. Problems will always be there, but your child should never feel left-out. This is a basic prerequisite of taking care of a child. They are not the reason for your troubles, and punishing them or leaving them behind is not the solution.
As individuals, you can make your child feel special through everyday gestures. Let us take a look at those!
Day to Day Practices To Make Your Child Feel Special
- Tell them you feel proud – You must tell your child that you are super proud of them! A genuine praise can help them to get motivation. A child seeks your approval and complaining/nagging brings them down. If they are participating in a singing or poetry writing contest, do not put the pressure that they HAVE to win. If they do not win a prize, do not show dissatisfaction. Tell them that you are proud! Making an effort and participation counts. Do not make the child feel like they are a failure. If they are not doing well in exams, you can find solutions rather than scolding them.
- Seek help from your child – A child wants to take charge of things! They love the idea of being the knight in shining armor. When you are not able to open a mobile application or want to water the garden, ask your child to help you out. They would love to take certain responsibilities because it helps them to feel responsible and the feeling that you trust their skills is priceless for the child.
- Enjoying a meal – Take out time to enjoy one major meal. You can sit down with them and have breakfast. Ask them about their hobbies and how karate class is going. The child wants you to get involved! There will be a time when they will not bother about your involvement, but as children they are seeking attention. No matter how busy your schedule is, it is important to have major meals with your kids. It could be dinner or lunch!
- Never count their weaknesses in front of strangers – A child does not like it when his/her parents make mockery of their weaknesses in front of relatives and strangers. Your child is not perfect. In fact, none of us are perfect. Never find out faults in your child and complain to the strangers/teachers/relatives. This makes them feel small and worthless.
- Never rubbish their feelings – Some children hide their emotions. This is a danger sign! If your child looks disturbed or troubled, ask about what is bothering them. They have nobody to share their feelings with. There are cases where children get raped by their own relatives and parent’s colleagues. There are instances where children get beaten up by teachers and bullies. If you are not asking them or rubbishing their feelings, then there is no way the child will open up. ”What is bothering you, son? You can trust me!” These are calming words that can help a child to feel loved and cared for.
- Never compare – If your older child is doing well in life does not mean that you will compare them with your younger child. There are some parents who compare their two children on the basis of looks and behavior. NEVER DO THIS! This can scar the child’s mind forever.
There are several benefits of having family meals together. You must plan outings and picnics with your child. They are still growing up. While disciplining them is okay, but taking away their childhood is not acceptable.
Your child needs love. Do you want them to grow up as bitter individuals?
How to make your child feel loved and valued? It is simple! Never compare, spend time with your children and believe in them. Praise them whenever they try hard because the blame game makes them bitter.
Focus on your child and go on device-free holidays. This way the child will grow up and become a responsible parent too!